I am so blessed to be on this journey I'm on. It is only by God's grace that I am where I am in my life. If I had continued on the rocky path of addiction, the results could have been more devastating than they were. Now that I have taken my life back, I can see the path much better. Numbing my pain & my mind had me walking through a mine field. That feeling of being all alone, lost, and confused is not something I want to dwell on, but finally recognizing I had a problem was so freeing.
Realizing I was lost, but had not lost the spiritual principles I already knew, was a great relief. Re-connecting with God was an even greater relief. He never left me. He never judged me. He never forgot about me when I had clearly forgotten about Him. His strength and encouragement sometimes overwhelms me. He has sent the most wonderful people into my path in the past 18 months. It brings tears to my eyes to think of all the blessings from those people. People from all walks of life, people from all across the Continental US & HI, people I never would have met had I not fallen.
Does that mean I'm glad I'm an addict in recovery? Not really, but this was and is God's plan for me. I must continue the walk along this path, that only God knows. If I try to venture out alone, He will somehow remind me to get my rear back on the path. He has the map, if I would just quit being so human and ignoring the signs along the way!
I can read the map a whole lot better with the encouragement of others and not on my own. Life is not meant to be a journey alone. Thank goodness for the journey with friends.